Not our fight

When I mentioned that my word for the year is War, I didn't tell the whole story.

It scared me to have a word like this assigned to me. And then I remembered that the word I got for 2012 was scary too. It was the word Health.

I wasn't sure what to do with or think of this word. Was I expected to work on my health? This is how I understood it at first. So I started out going to the doctor. I'd been having vague but troubling pain and thought it was an ovarian cyst. The doctor, after blood tests, ordered an ultrasound. During the ultrasound the tech couldn't find a cyst on the side I had pain on so I asked her to look at my kidney since stones are my ongoing struggle. She looked....she moaned. I knew. It was full with 3 large stones and lots of little ones.

Two lithotripsies later, I finally did some research on something a friend told me about probably 15 years ago. She had recurring stones and had found out it was her parathyroid that was out of whack and after having it removed, she never had another stone! It seemed too good to be true, but I looked into it 15 years later. I had asked many doctors if the parathyroid could be the problem. They had all said that was very rare and I would have tons of stones if that were the case. So I never doubted them. And I never did my own research on it.

After my blood work in March came back with high calcium again (....always high....never explained), I did not ask my doctor what she knew about the parathyroid. I simply asked her if I could get a PTH blood test to see if my parathyroid hormone was too high. And she did order the test because I told her about the research I had done. This PTH hormone triggers a release of calcium from bones and teeth and sends it into the blood stream. It also causes a LOT of other symptoms that I never would have put all together with the same root cause. You can read about it on the Parathyroid page if you're interested. It is a lot more common than doctors have been educated to think and it is so easy to diagnose with that blood test.

My main symptoms were the stones (although not everyone has kidney stones with this) and also a growing depression and lethargy that was so alarming by summer that I seriously had the thought in the back of my mind that I was dying. I didn't know then that this was because of the hormone overload.

I put off seeing the surgeon until after my daughter's wedding in late October, but I wish I'd had it as soon as I knew my levels were high because I felt SO much better after the surgery. The wedding pictures showed me with heavy eyelids and looking very tired and worn. And that's how I felt. Three weeks later I had a simple out patient surgery to remove just one of my four parathyroid glands. They are normally the size of a grain of rice. The doctor said mine was the size of a peanut M&M, then remembering it was Thanksgiving time, he changed that to the size of a cranberry.  ;)

Now I'm feeling great and don't run out of energy by noon. I can barely remember that dreadful feeling of lethargy and apathy. And it wasn't until I was wondering about a word for 2013 that I realized that last year's word was something completely different than I had imagined. Health wasn't something I was supposed to achieve on my own.

I do think we should work to be healthier, but I'm saying my word for the year wasn't like that. It didn't depend on me. It was given to me as a gift! And I may not have picked up on God's intervention in it all if it hadn't been for my word of the year being health. He knew the journey I would be on this past year.

Realizing this helped me to understand the 2013 word War better. Spiritual warfare is active, it's a tool for us to use (every day). But it's a gift too. We don't do the fighting. We ask God to fight for us and for our loved ones, for our country and our world. And He is faithful and will hear our cry and answer us.

This year has been a time of waking up for me. I am so much more aware of things to pray about and people to pray for. I only hope I am faithful to keep alert to it because we frail humans tend to fall back to sleep so easily. Lord, keep us sharp and in tune to Your leading.

Acclimating

It is amazing how you can acclimate to different environments. I met Charles in Texas while we were attending seminary in Ft. Worth. It was the coldest winter they had experienced in years. Snow, ice, freezing rain. I bought my first ever winter coat (hey, I grew up in Phoenix). It was wool and cute and I wore it all the time. It was cold. Charles and I started dating and he introduced me to hot tea and the fixing thereof. Kettle boiled only, no microwaved water, ready the mug with a Constant Comment tea bag, pour in the water and steep for at least 3 minutes, stir, squeeze bag and save it for the next cup (we were poor seminary students). Add 2 scant spoons of sugar and a swig of milk. Enjoy with cold fingers wrapped around the mug and your boyfriend right beside you. Nice.

From there we moved to a tiny town in Oklahoma....another 2 years of cold snappish winter for that area. Snow, smell of wood smoke in the air. Then to New Jersey for 10 years, where it is cold all winter long. Lots of snowing and freezing rains and lots of hot tea, winter coats and even boots. The fall there was amazingly quaint and fun. Pumpkin picking hayrides at local farms, mums (NJ is prime mum country!), Ivan's Spiced Wafers, canning produce and absolutely electrified fall colored leaves. It was beautiful in fall and very charming with all the farm stands and atmosphere.

We finally moved back to Arizona, but not to Phoenix. We lived in a small mountain town with a miniature ski area and again, lots of snow, short summers, quick falls and damp springs with all the snow melting.

In other words....to put it shortly....and sum things up....we have always lived (as long as we've been a couple) in cold climates. Brrr, hot tea, sit by the fire, wood smoke in the air.

Then five years ago, we moved to Phoenix, where the high temperature is not under 80 degrees until November. We keep the air conditioner on until then too. It's....different. Last year I had a hard time decorating for Christmas or getting into a holiday mood because it was still warm in late November.

Today is September 20 and the highs have dipped into the 90's for a week now. The mornings are a crisp 78. I have already baked ginger snaps and pumpkin bars. I have been cooking things like potatoes and I am looking up bread recipes. Today it slipped back up to 102 but I still stopped by the grocery store to pick up some more pumpkin and baking supplies.

The manager of that store must be new in town! I asked a worker where the canned pumpkin was hiding. She explained to me in detail how it was not the season for it and they will be carrying it closer to fall. Hello....it's almost October.

I think I'm re-climatized now....back to thinking like a Phoenician I guess.

I'm feeling the birthday love

The President and I turned 50 today.

I don't know how he feels about it, but so far it's been okay for me. ;) For some reason though, when you turn another decade older, people think it's alright to broadcast it for you and embarrass the heck out of you. But I do love how the birthday turns into a birthweek celebration when everyone knows it's your big birthday.

Friends and family have taken me to lunch and gone shopping with me this week. Nice, bright yellow mums are sitting on my dining room table from my sweet husband. Last week my family all got together and celebrated my birthday as well as my sister Jodi's birthday and my brother being home for a visit.

Last night at small group my friend Edith made me a wonderful cake with pineapple and cream cheese and whipped cream. It looked great....well, except for the huge number 50 in the middle. I told her she was mean, but she just laughed. My small group blessed me so much last night with a huge houseplant, a card signed by all of them and some news of a new baby on the way for one of them. (I will let you wonder, but thankfully it is not me!) They really blew me away when they gathered around me and prayed blessings over me and thanked God for me. I don't even have words for that.

Then this morning and put on my birthday suit and noticed it needs starch or something. Two of my sisters called to scream "Happy birthday!" to me before they fly out to Ireland. I'm glad people are enjoying my birthday to the fullest.

I check my email to find 70+ birthday messages from Facebook friends. It made me cry. I really appreciate Facebook for more closely connecting me with friends, past and present. I like the birthday greetings on Facebook, but there is a reason I did not include my birthyear, Mom! Thanks for outing me. >:( ;)

Later today all of my four daughters and my husband will gather with me and grill steaks, play games and there may be guitar playing/singing if I'm lucky.

Feeling appreciated and loved is a great blessing. And today I am really, really blessed.

Thank you!

The daily touch

Have you ever taken account of how many people your life interconnects with each day? I'm trying to count them up today....and it's amazing.

~My husband, morning chatter
~Daughter, quick hug and kiss before she left for school
~15 minutes with my mom as I took her to church.
~People at the church office as I manned the front office today--nothing more than a wave to 2, stuck tongue out at one (he started it), flirted with husband, small talk with another.
~Said hello to some ladies at the Bible study while I brought my mom in then I jetted off to the office.
~One of them pulled me aside (as she is always doing) and offered to prepare lunch for the people who help us move in 2 weeks.
~Chatted with a friend who is just getting out after major surgery as she popped into the office. Today was the first day she actually styled her hair (spikes...cute!) since it's started growing back in from chemo.
~Said thank you to a friend who came by with an unexpected gift. It was a very quick 'gift and run'. It blessed me.
~Sister on phone
~Dear friend, a new widow since December, on phone...plans to play racketball.
~A bed-ridden shut in on phone. Her back is very painful, please pray for RS.
~Man working on resume, just lost a good job because of the economy.
~A man from Liberia who is trying to make a living here now.
~Sent a text thanking someone (in Nebraska, not Texas) who said they were praying for me.
~Another friend who is a new widow since September. Nice to see her smiling, chattering, keeping busy.
~Theology of prayer discussion with husband over hot dogs and salad at Costco. ;)
~The man who rang up my things at Costco looked so familiar. I know him from my past...who is he? High School? College? I realized it was college as I wheeled my cart out. He didn't recognize me either so I didn't say anything. I remember his name now. But I had only given him a polite "thank you" in the store.
~An older woman who couldn't remember where she parked in the parking lot....she spotted her car just then and we laughed. I love encountering people who make me laugh.
~Waved and said hello to the neighbor who was raking up pine needles.
~Fussed at my dog for getting underfoot while carrying in heavy groceries. I forgave her quickly and we had some kisses.
~Sent a text to a very dear friend, who lives in another state, whose life is reeling with so many concerns and now she has to help plan her sister's funeral for Thursday.
~A 13 year old boy who rides home with us as we waited for my daughter to come out. We talked about Xbox and bowling.
~Chatted with daughter a bit in the car, we teased the boy and talked about Angry Birds, relatives, friends and why some girls are nice to boys but not to other girls (all in less than 10 minutes).
~Read messages from friends in far off places and wrote messages back to some ...people who I've connected with again from the past on Facebook and people I've chosen to connect with because of some similar interests on a forum. I breathed out a lot of prayers as I read along in each place. Dear people, all of them.

It is amazing how many lives we touch in the course of one day.....and they all touch ours back.

An honor

I was honored this week by a blogging friend at Chrysalis. She gave me a

.

You can check out her stylish e-zine blog  here and make sure you check out her many articles and reviews....lots of interesting topics!!

Here are the Rules
• First, thank and link back to the person who gave you this award
• Second, share 7 things about yourself
• Third, award 15 recently discovered great bloggers
• Then, contact these bloggers and tell them they’ve won this award


Seven Random Things about Me:
1. I'm in the middle of a move to a different house, so I'm a crazy person (and I am sticking with that story even after the move).
2. As my children are leaving the nest and flying off to discover the world and what God has for them, my husband and I are finding it very quiet around here.  It takes a lot of adjusting. And it makes our 13 year old a little restless being an only child after living in a house full of sisters and activity!
3. I started volunteering to do receptionist type of work at our church two mornings a week.
4. I love (and am quite good at) figuring out people's Myers-Briggs personality type. Oh and I'm an ESFP.
5. I do love January in Phoenix, even though I miss a snowy climate and having a nice wood stove.
6. I love Facebook and find it reminds me of living in a small town, the way that you can spread news so quickly, keep in touch so closely and stay in closer touch with friends on a daily basis.
7. My love languages are acts of service and really good chocolate.

Here are my honorees. Please feel free to follow these guidelines or not. =)

Great blogs I read and want to pass on the Award to:
1. Pioneer Woman Cooks is a great cooking blog. She makes each recipe step by step with lovely photos and hilarious commentary.
2. Pocket Lint has been a long time favorite of mine. It's written by my wonderful friend Gillian about life with two special needs children.
3. Tara's View of the World is written by my friend Tara about her life of raising three children, one with autism and being a minister's wife.
4. KQ Cards, a photography blog by my friend Kathryn who has a great eye for photography!
5. Penned in Orange is my wonderful collegiate friend Sara's blog. She writes poetry and is a great photographer also!
6. Veritas, my husband's blog..... a more serious and thoughtful blog.
7. Alive and Mortal is written by my friend Kim. It is an expressive arts blog for grieving people and a place for the grieving to share their journey.
8. A Holy Experience is a beautiful blog experience with lovely photography, devotional, inspirational and poetic writing.
9. Blackpurl's Knitpickings is not about knitting, but is a friend who knits, who also writes about life in Belize as a missionary.
10. Walking to China is another friend who is living in China and a surprise to her, foster parenting a special needs baby there as well.
11. Joann's Blog Adventure is written by another ministry wife friend of mine.....usually a very hilarious look at life in ministry and raising four children.
12. Laundromat is my friend Michele's blog. She writes from a  very Canadian, very honest and very fun view of life married to a minister with two teenaged boys, one hound dog and has an interesting career as the director of a downtown cultural center for Native Canadians (because I forget the correct term). 
13. Shasher's Life is an energetic blog for women by another Canadian friend.
14. Empty Handed is written by another ministry wife who lives in Australia....wonderful photography and cheerful blog.
15. Agape Life, which is my daughter Hannah's blog. She writes so well, but not often. Keep an eye on her though. She has great thoughts!

Whew! That takes a long time to get all of that together, but I am excited to show you the blogs I've been reading lately. Hope you take some time and look at them. Save the links for when you have time to peruse and read good things.

Thank you again to e-mom at Chrysalis for honoring my blog on her awards list.

The van

I think I promised a story here. My apologies for being tardy about it.

This is a story about a van.


The first pastorate that Charles had was doing church planting in New Jersey. One of the churches in that area was Bridgeview Baptist Church, which sat in the middle of an old neighborhood in a tiny borough called Delair in the township of Pennsauken. This church had a parsonage right beside it and since their bi-vocational pastor owned his own home, they wanted the new church planters to live there for as long as they needed it. We did....for ten wonderful years. When our church planting time was over, the church next door to us was just losing their pastor because of a job transfer in his company, so they called  Charles to be pastor at Bridgeview.  I could go on and on about life in New Jersey, it was a place that was different in all ways from the places we had grown up and lived. Some day (not tomorrow) I'll do that little thing.

When I saw this picture below on my friend Sara's blog, I jumped up and down in my heart. (I was sitting or I may have jumped in my legs too) I showed it to all of my kids and to Charles. I posted it on Facebook wondering which of my friends would remember it.  The picture was not of our van. It was taken by Sara just a few days before she posted it....in Oregon. I guess someone could have bought the van in NJ and brought it back to life and driven it to Oregon, but that is doubtful.

The other thing that struck me like a lightning bolt was that it looked like the front of our dear home in New Jersey! We had a sidewalk like the one in the picture, we had huge maple trees in the yard, and we had no driveway, so our van was always parked in front, just like in this picture. Wow, it brought back memories.

Our first child, Hannah, was only 2 months old when we moved to that house. And I was pregnant with our last child, Maggie, when we left. We lived there 10 years and raised our first three daughters there through their preschool years and beyond.

We found the van at a used car lot one day. It was roomie. You could stand up, hunched over, and walk around in it, handy with preschoolers, car seats and camping trips. It had a huge wagon area behind the back seat where we could stow everything we needed for camping trips.  And it was cool.

I grew up in the 60's and 70's and had always wanted to own a VW van.  I used to day dream about taking one cross country and seeing places and doing things. I just never pictured it with 3 little kids and a dog, which in reality is a lot different than my vision, but it was still fun. We did this several times in that van. Once to Colorado to meet up with family for a camping trip and once to Tennessee to meet up with family for another vacation. That trip was murder to come home from. There was a heat wave on the east coast and our air conditioning did not work much of the time in that van. So I bought a spray bottle and would spray our little kids til they dripped, and the dog too, and we drove with the windows down, like we were basting little roasts in a convection oven. We also took that van to Vermont many times on camping trips. We had a campground there that we loved, at Quechee Gorge. That was where we made a lot of memories and built strong bonds with our children.

We also drove that van across Pennsylvania each summer to a children's camp by Erie, PA. Every year Charles would be invited to do the music and teach classes at this camp for northwest Pennsylvania and the whole family would come along.  We had our own little cabin to stay in and it was a great experience. I was the camp nurse once but I didn't do it again because I can't stand cleaning up wounds and blood.

It was a traveling sort of van. It evoked a spirit of adventure and exploration. We loved living in New Jersey partly because it was full of things to see. We took the van to Cape May, NJ many times, to Lancaster County, PA, to Baltimore, to Virginia, Chesapeake Bay, the shore (as they say in NJ), even New York City once to see another church planter friend in Queens.

Something that is kind of a secret we found out is that when you drive a VW van, you are automatically in a club. I started noticing right off the bat when we got the van, that people who drove other VW vans wave at you....and give you the peace sign with their fingers or nod their heads at you as you pass by. I told a teenaged friend about this and she thought I was exaggerating until she rode with me in it a few times. Sometimes when we traveled, another VW in the opposite traffic lanes would shout out the window and honk their horns at us. I loved it!  Super cool. What days those were.

The secret club is also the reason I killed our van one day. I was on the way home from picking up Bethany at kindergarten, when someone pointed at me while passing and yelling something out the window. Strange, they were not in a VW at all....maybe they usually drive one and had forgotten they were not in their club van for identification. Then someone behind me began honking.....NOT a VW van either. Wondering if they were impatient, I pulled over to let them pass. I am just slightly not intuitive sometimes.  Then a police car pulled up beside me and asked me if I knew there was smoke coming out of my van.

Yikes.

I drove into a parking lot and parked. There was gray smoke pouring out of the back of the van. Hours later Charles had to have it towed to a shop where it was discovered that I had been driving without oil and the head gasket (I still don't know what that is) had cracked (which is a very bad thing for any gasket).

Sad day.

I mourned for my van, but there was no fixing it. The one part cost as much as the van had cost in the first place. ($2500) So we had to say goodbye to our lovely van. We were booted from the club, which was also a hard blow. We bought a used Honda Civic, 2 door....no offense but there was no love for that car at ALL. A 2 door, low to the ground car, as pretty as it was, was really hard on a family of five with one child still in a car seat.

So seeing that picture, Sara, was like seeing a very old friend, like a box of memories in front of those cool fall maple trees....

....like a gift from God, a sweet connection to those wonderful days.

Thanks Sara for posting that picture!

Birthday events

Thank you for all the birthday wishes by phone, by email (thanks Tay), and by facebook! That was fun reading those in my mailbox first thing today....and getting my birthday wake up call from Laurie Luker very first thing!

My children are all home for a couple of weeks, with the recent return of Hannah, so we are laughing a lot, there are squeals of happy late night talking from Bethany's room, and watching lots of Gilmore Girls. I am about to get a pedicure from Bethany while we watch Martha Stewart. Tonight Charles and I are going out with friends and tomorrow I will get together with my mom and a couple of my sibs.

I am happy.

I did a 'what celebs do you share a birthday with' quiz on facebook/wikipedia and came up with:

1. Louis Armstrong
2. Billy Bob Thornton
3. Barack Obama
4. Jeff Gordon
5. Cole and Dylan Sprouse (Suite life of zack and cody kids)

And this morning I turned on Regis and Kelly and it's also GILMAN'S birthday. WILL the coinkidinks never cease? haha Actually Barack, Gilman and I were all born in the same year, same day too. I am wordless.

whoopee! (which is not an actual word, but in interjection)

Peace, baby

I am desperate for material folks, so I copied Joann's blog. =)

Your Word is "Peace"

You see life as precious, and you wish everyone was safe, happy, and taken care of. Social justice, human rights, and peace for all nations are all important to you. While you can't stop war, you try to be as calm and compassionate as possible in your everyday life. You promote harmony and cooperation. You're always willing to meet someone a little more than halfway.

What's Your Word?

Quirktitude appreciation day

Here is a fun thing bloggers do to ....er, FOR...each other. heehee They find one of these little questionaires of embarrassing stuff about yourself. Someone tags you and then you must do the 'meme' and follow the rules! All in fun, and I got tagged yesterday by Shasher, a fellow pastor's wife and friend. Her quirks are very interesting! Mine are unspectacular (kinda like the tweens' television show 'Unfabulous'), but here we go....

The Rules!
1. Link the person(s) who tagged me
2. Mention the rules on my blog
3. Tell about six unspectacular quirks of mine
4. Tag six fellow blogger's by linking them
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged.

As for six fellow bloggers, I will let you decide if you want to join in. Let me know if you do this! (Taylor)


1. I animate things. Anything. When I was in grade school I remember raising my desk lid and pretending my pencils were a family and they had an elaborate life there in my desk. Stuffed animals are my favorite thing to animate, as I've talked about before. Each stuffed animal has it's own personality and voice. And I can't help it....it just happens. I can also tell you what is going on in an animal's mind, narrating them (usually out loud and much to the irritation of my kids) as I watch them.

2. I like to rhyme. My sister once told me that people with certain kinds of psychosis do this. It had me worried for about 15 minutes. Then I started blabbering on about how psychosis is a diagnosis which is quite precocious for someone who doesn't know this. eh heh

3. I like things to match. It used to drive me crazy if my underwear that matched a certain outfit wasn't ready to wear with the outfit. While that may be too much information for some of you, it is true.....and it is quirky....so there you go. That was in my teens though, and now it usually translates to my home. It is very unsettling to me to have my red hutch in beside the cobalt blues and apple greens in my kitchen/eating area. I must paint it.....soon!

4. When Hannah and I are together, we sometimes start to talk in short and fast quips like on Gilmore Girls. It's so exciting when we get into a long run of quick quips and say funny things. I get so excited that I usually jump up and say, "We did it!" which usually breaks the quiptitude of the moment.

5. I mimic sounds and people. It is not making fun, although it IS fun. I just do it to describe someone, especially my kids at school. When Bethany started working with kids I had the previous year at an after school care, I could describe the kids and their voices or the way they talked or moved when they talked so that she instantly knew who I was talking about.

6. I like words and learning new ones. I like to use new words or invent them. Free Rice is a fun game with interesting words. AND it helps donate free rice to hungry people. I always play to 1,000 grains. If I go over 1,000 by mistake, I play to 2,000. I'm not a perfectionist by any means, I just really like symmetry.

Friday Feast #188

Appetizer
Name something you would categorize as weird.

The fashion trend of sagging. Today at our second grade field day games, one of the little boys in our class lost a relay race because his pants were falling down. We were screaming his name as a chant, as we did for the other kids in our class when they were in an event. But as soon as I saw that, my chant became, "Wear a belt, wear a belt, wear a belt!"

It is a pretty strictly enforced rule at our school not to wear sagging pants, but if the child has a huge shirt on over the pants, it can be hidden. *rolling my eyes at the very thought again*

Soup
What color was the last piece of food you ate?

Deep berry-ish pink. (raspberry sherbet....very delish)


Salad
On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being highest, how much do you enjoy being alone?

4 I really do not like being all alone. However I do enjoy being in a crowd or at a place like a mall or park and not knowing anyone. This way I'm not technically alone, but really I am. No one is talking to me and I do not have to be thinking of conversation or entertaining anyone. It would be really nice to be able to do this at my own home. I would be able to be at home with family members there, but they would not talk to me or ask me anything...and they would even prepare their own meals....just for one day. I think it would be SO relaxing and I would be able to really concentrate on things instead of my train of thought or activities being constantly interrupted and redirected.


Main Course
Fill in the blank: I will _________ vote for ___________ in _______.

I will resolutely vote for Pedro in 2008.

Dessert
Describe your sleeping habits.

It is now 10:04pm and I am lying in my bed, on my side and my laptop is on my night stand. I'm typing away at a lame blog post so that people will come here. (see, it worked....*points at you*) Later, about 10:20, I will start playing Web Sudoku, thinking I will slip in a quick game before turning out the light. At approximately 11:40, I will realize how late it is, berate myself about cutting my sleep hours short again and close the computer. I will fall soundly asleep within about half an hour and awaken 2-3 times to plod my way to the bathroom, waking for the last time at 5am, at which time I will be mad because I only have an hour left to sleep and it will be hard then to get into a good sleep. (mostly because I'm mad) My wicked, wicked alarm will go off at 6:11am, I will sigh a big mourning morning sigh and plod to the bathroom to take a shower and begin my day.



***Go to Friday's Feast to learn more or to do your own spread.***

7 Things About Me

I got tagged by Julie, The Accidental Pastor's Wife to do a meme called, 7 Things. Thank you Julie for thinking of me....I need a little nudging these days I think.

I thought I had done this before, but when I found my old post, I had changed it to 7 Things I've Learned. So here goes.




1. I make stuffed animals come to life. I've tried desperately to stop, but I just can't help myself! I just start channeling them.

We used to wonder WHY in the world our 2 year old (who is now 16) had a New York accent. Yes, we lived in New Jersey at the time, but none of us had accents. It was the strangest thing. Then one night while I was putting her to bed, I realized her BEAR was talking to her with a New York accent! (Long Island to be specific) It was very funny....and kinda scary. I didn't even realize! Bears kind of take on a life and personality of their own around me....and I obey. (complete with swirling spirals in my eyes)

My oldest daughter, who is now 20, starts talking back to the animal I'm animating and then she gets all embarrassed and hits me! The last time it happened was on vacation 3 years ago. We bought a little stuffed zebra for Maggie. (and by the way, it looks exactly like the picture above!) He kept trying to convince Hannah that he was a donkey and she was arguing with him. Then when we laughed at her, she wouldn't even look at the zebra the rest of the trip....even though he tried desperately to get her attention! I still had trouble even tonight typing z e b r a instead of donkey. (see, I believed him too!) He's a persuasive little runt!

I used to think I might like to work as a voice for a cartoon character or puppets on Sesame Street but it came in handy as a mom too.

2. I was a double major in college. I have a major in Theater/Speech and also in Religion. Neither of these degrees has come in useful in finding employment, but I had fun in college. (thanks Mom!)

3. I love to study the Bible. I used to keep notebooks full of notes. I love taking classes of Bible studies, especially studying one book at a time. My favorite study recently was the study of the book of Daniel, taught by Beth Moore. I also love it when my husband (the pastor) preaches through books of the Bible. I just think that is the way it should be taught, unless you're doing a word study or topical study.

4. I am a very very visual person. I love love love it when people used word pictures to teach or to get a point across or when used in song or prose. If I can channel my imagination towards what I am supposed to be paying attention to, my mind won't start daydreaming in a totally different direction. And I love movies, television shows and music videos.....something I can wrap my eyes around and grabs my imagination.

5. I am not a book reader. This is really embarrassing to me, but it's true. I start books and only read 2 or 3 chapters before leaving it to collect dust on the shelf. (Cheryl I really need to return those books to you that you loaned me a year and a half ago!) I will read novels, but rarely take the time....I usually take one or two books on vacation because we camp. I watch my kids reading books when we're camping, and it looks so interesting and relaxing, but if the book doesn't grab my attention in the first chapter, I end up people or animal watching instead.

6. I love to cook.And I love to watch cooking shows. I don't get to spend as much time at it as I did when I wasn't working, but I still find it very stress-relieving, something I can do for my family or friends and it is a creative outlet for me.

7. I love collecting bits of knowledge. I read articles all the time about the world, medical or health related issues and entertainment. It's fun to throw little snippets of knowledge around when I'm chatting with people. I just wish I could remember where I get those snippets from and how valid they are when I'm discussing them. (Know your source kind of thing)


This is what you do if you get tagged, or you can just consider yourself tagged because you came here and read this and do your own! =)

1. Link to your tagger (that's ME) and post these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

I'm sorry this is so massively long. Next time we should do a 7 things I need to be better at meme. My first one would be 'use less words', be concise, wrap it up, less is more, etc. ;)

Who would like to be tagged? Oh, I see the Pastor's Wives on my bloglines are lining up to try this!
1. Krista
2. Gillian
3. Donna
4. Amy
5. Tracy
6. Gette
7. Michelle

Let me introduce you to....my brain

This was a fun personality type of test. The link is at the bottom. It is pretty right on, I think my 'sides' are pretty balanced, but the right side takes preference as I see it.

Because my father recently went through the end of his life with dementia and two of his sisters had/have Alzheimer's, I am trying to put into practice some more challenging things with my brain....and although I like it, I'm not talking about Sudoku! lol I have been trying to do some writing exercises, like poetry and grading school papers without a grading key. I am a second grade teacher's aid....so it's not as if it's extremely challenging, it just gives my mind a little workout. I want to challenge myself to write a children's book/story, but I am way too wordy I've found. Need to learn conciseness. (wow, that is a real word, I thought I was being silly, but my spellcheck didn't argue with me)

And now....my brain:

You Are 30% Left Brained, 70% Right Brained

The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning. Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others. If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic. Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet. The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility. Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way. If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art. Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.

Are You Right or Left Brained?

The aloof and the brokenhearted, a lesson forced upon me

One of my favorite tools on the internet is Bloglines, where you can put in the addresses of your favorite blogs and see when they are updated. That way, I don't have to check 60 pages on the internet every day. I would probably have given many of them up by now since they post sporadically. But Bloglines makes checking updates easy. When there is a new post, that blog in the list is highlighted.

One of the blogs I love to read is by Beth Moore, Bible teacher and women's ministry encourager. She is usually hilarious, very personal and honest and often has profound things right in the middle and woven all through her entertaining writing. Today she asked us who are regular readers to check in and give our age, denomination and our favorite 'truth' right now from the Bible. So that got me remembering all the things God's been showing me lately.

I have felt burdened in the past few months to put myself 'out there' more for people. I usually operate under the protection of a certain distance between my heart and other people. It is one of those things that most pastor's wives learn early on, usually after being hurt by the people we let close, just because of human nature and how we're all jerks sometimes. And although it is not right, it is a defense technique that we learn very well. And it is partly my personality to be just a little bit aloof in my relationships. My friends (and family) who read this blog are surprised by how open and personal I am on here because I don't usually do that in person. I feel like I can here because it's not one on one, it's out there to a group and I am not accountable to one person, to remember to connect with them regularly. This sounds really hideous now that I am putting it into words, but I have to be honest to make the point. I love people. I love the people at our church and where I work, but whenever I make the step closer to someone, I usually disappoint them in a number of ways and the distance is protection from that. I am just here and there in my attachments because I like contact with a lot of people and you just can't be BFF's or counselor or comforter to a lot of people.

But here is the thing....the point rather.....God puts up with that only so long before you get a friendly little shove towards someone. And then you find that it is not as hard on you as you thought and you don't tend to think about the disappointing people thing as much as when you were more aloof. So I got my shove and God is starting to give me the words for the people He is putting alongside me....because it is not from me. People who needed a connection and a friend. People who needed spiritual advice or comfort.....and prayer. I can't tell you how many people I have pulled aside and prayed for lately and it has really blessed them to be cared for like that. (by God, not me) And then the answers! There they come....very faithfully. God is amazing and although I may disappoint people in things like not remembering birthdays *cringe* or forgetting to call them when I should, but God never disappoints. I am usually a goofball and not a "Let's talk about that" kind of person. That always scared me off in the past, I think because of my personality. But God, who gives us inborn personalities, also equips us with supernatural gifts of the Spirit just when we need them. Because like I said, it was not my choice to go deeper. These people sought me out or were brought to my attention by the Lord.

I had to learn that it is not me who is the true Friend. It's Jesus. And we need to let Jesus care for people who are disconnected and lonely, overwelmed or hurting through us. And no, I just can't do it....but HE can....and He does. And i just wanted to share that in case you are needing to put yourself 'out there' a little more for others. Because, as Psalm 34 says,

17 The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.

18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

And often, He wants to use US to be His hands and feet in drawing close to those brokenhearted.

And to be 'aloof', we would just be 'a fool' when God gives the shove. (I'm really wanting to say 'from above' here but will refrain since this is supposed to be serious.)

Wordless Wednesday: Christmastime 1983

Newly engaged, that is Charles and me. ;) (click to enlarge)



***To see more entries or to join in and do your own, go to Wordless Wednesday or 5 Minutes for Mom.***

Friday's Feast #169

***Go to Friday's Feast to learn more or to do your own spread.***

Appetizer
What was your first “real” job?
In my junior year in high school I worked at THE MALL. I worked at a Waldenbooks bookstore. It was a good job except for the nazi boss I had. She would sneak in on Sundays to see if we were breaking the rules. No trust.....or much respect. I think I lasted 3 months there. My next job, at another mall, was a relief. I worked at Pixy Portrait Studio in JCPenneys and I got to take portraits of children. We only photographed children. Very fun people to work for and fun work....making kids smile. Perfect job for me. (I just had a revelation...or is that an epiphany?) hmmmmm

Soup
Where would you go if you wanted to spark your creativity?
My sister's (and BIL's..lol) cabin, a secluded place in the woods. And it would be winter, during a snowstorm....or in summer during the monsoon season. Weather inspires me....as long as I am inside just looking at it.

Salad
Complete this sentence: I am embarrassed when…
......I feel like I"ve done the wrong thing or said something stupid. It could be any hour of the day. I do a lot of embarrassing things....and I have embarrassing children sometimes. (well I think that is paybacks for when I was a kid) I'm even somewhat embarrassed by this question.

Main Course
What values did your parents instill in you?
Compassion for the underdog, respect, honesty, love of God and home.



Dessert
Name 3 fads from your teenage years.

Oh my! The seventies were full of fads.

~Clackers....glass balls on the ends of a string with a metal washer in the middle of the string and you hold the washer and raise the thing up and down until the ends are 'clacking' away in a butterfly-ish pattern. You could get those pups going so fast that you couldn't see the balls anymore. They were banned at my school after several incidents of breakage and flying broken glass balls.

~Pogo sticks....I never could do it. It's one of my embarrassments.

~Clothing: track shoes, cut off jean shorts like Daisy Duke wears, bell bottomed hip huggers, smock blouses, peasant tops, tie dye anything, platform shoes (for guys or girls), Levi 501 button up jeans (I loved those), earth shoes, berets, bandanas, knee socks, maxi skirts, vests, gauzy shirts.

November 1

.....and it is still warm enough during the day to run the air conditioning.

And that is all I"m saying about that....I don't want to be a whiiiiiiiiiiiner. It's just that I"m finding it hard to get into the holiday mood. By now my house usually smells of scented holiday candles, my husband would be having little evening fires in his chiminea, and we are listening to a lot of Christmas music.

It's just unusually warm this year, even for Phoenix. I sure hope the mood kicks in soon though. There is nothing better than a nice holiday season. We're having Thanksgiving at our house this year, along with relatives and maybe a few others. The mood should be settling in while I am busy planning a menu and trying to find a good tablecloth to use. I looked at Target today but all I found were some fall decorations for half price. =) You just can't argue with a 69 cent grapevine pumpkin.....or, apparently, a six dollar set of three nature thingie covered balls the size of grapefruits in a rustic wooden box. It looks nice on my living room shelf.

My puppy got shots today. She is feeling whimpy.

I woke up with a cold in my throat this morning. bleh

My kitchen cabinets are DONE and back on their hinges!!!!! I picked out the new countertops but they will be installed at a later date. I will ask Michelle to hassle me to get the before/after pics up by tomorrow.

I took a seven year old to the nurse's office first thing this morning with a potentially school shutting down germ. I will let you know if it really is....I'm kind of worried and am about 99% sure that it was indeed the bad germ. Pray for him please.

And there you go, Michelle.....my November 1 post. ;) I almost forgot!

The life and times of a crickl

I was tagged by Gill at Gill's Jottings for this meme. If you are reading this, consider yourself tagged and let me know if you did one!


1. What I was doing ten years ago: Ten years ago I had just had a baby (our last), just moved cross country from NJ to a small mountain town in northern AZ. I had a 10 year old and a 7 year old in public school and a 5 year old who I was homeschooing. I was trying to ease into it and loved it.



2. Five years ago: We lived in that same mountain town and were very happy homeschoolers with daughters who were 15, 12, 10 and 5. We were a little worse for the wear of several tragedies in our world and town. A year later we started to feel God's urging to move on, but we didn't know it would take 2 years for the process to happen. Charles was seeking God's will for future plans and I was avoiding the subject. I wasn't ready to move....but a year later God changed my heart totally.



3 One year ago:We had moved to metro Phoenix, AZ and bought our first home. Our 19 year old daughter had stayed in college in Flagstaff, 2 hours away. Our 14 and 16 year olds were active in school and church youth group. I was still homeschooling our youngest, who was 9. They were finally ready to say that they were glad we had moved and although it had been hard to give up life in Williams, that they could see God's hand in the move and in their lives because of it. Hannah worked at a coffee shop and a property management office and Bethany worked at Chic fil a at our local mall. I was still a stay at home mom. Charles was busy as a pastor of a medium sized urban church...so many opportunities, it's hard to focus on what specific thing God had led us here for. He had been on a mission trip to Texas to help hurricane Katrina victims and was gearing up to go on a mission trip to the Ukraine. We had also traveled to Israel a year before, the trip of a lifetime. We loved it.



4. Yesterday: (Monday) It as a very busy day, as I had begun working last April in our public schools. I am a teaching assistant now for 2 second grade classes and our youngest is going to a different public school (a 'traditional' school) 2 miles away. She is having a difficult time adjusting to the increased work load and strict demands of this school, but it is good for her, she needed some more discipline in her studies, and she enjoys the socializing above all! Beth is a senior, taking one class at the high school and next semester beginning college classes (she now works doing after school care at Maggie's school and loves it), Emma is a sophomore and made the drumline this year, playing snare. She just got her permit to learn to drive and her first cell phone. She is a texting magnificado! Last month she had almost 800 texts. (I'm sure you're very impressed) Hannah still lives in Flagstaff and works full time at the property management place, but may have lots of changes coming up soon. Charles is day by day catching a vision for this new church we are at now. It is such an established church, it was hard to see just what his vision should be, but God is revealing it gradually. He is now preparing to go on a mission trip next summer to Mozambique, Africa.



5. 5 snacks I enjoy: What a transition! lol From deep reminiscing to snacks! Okay, I love:
popcorn
gingersnaps
I'm trying to really enjoy fruit
cheese and crackers
dips of all kinds



6. 5 Things I would do if I suddenly had $100 million:
~I would faint!
~I would tithe on it somehow, or make it a special offering to help remodel our church.
~I would save a lot for our kids' schooling, weddings and pay off our home.
~I might find worthy causes to help like missions efforts and helping send people on mission trips to increase awareness and compassion for the world's needs. I would love to do that.
~I would buy a cabin in the mountains.....or an RV to do some traveling.



7. 5 locations I would like to run away to:
Is this a trick question? If I tell you, then you'll be able to find me. Pretty sneaky.
New England (It's Fall there), San Diego, Australia and New Zealand, western Canada, Montana.



8. 5 bad habits I have:
*staying up too late
*too much computer
*biting the side of my tongue...ouch (I've heard it's a stress reaction)
*saying my thoughts out loud...much of the time very lame, goofy thoughts.
*being grouchy around my home =(



9. 5 things I like doing:
*watching movies with my kids
*holding hands with my Charles
*traveling
*eating out
*raquetball



10. 5 TV shows I like:
~Cold Case
~HGtv decorating shows
~Gilmore Girls (I'm in denial that it's been cancel....Star's Hollow will go on)
~House
~Smallville



11. 5 things I hate doing:
*cleaning bathrroms
*running errands when it's hot
*ironing
*doctor visits (boooooo)
*dieting



12. 5 Biggest joys of the moment:
~I'm in my bed
~Tomorrow is a short day at work
~My pastor's wives friends online
~My puppy
~My wonderful family...I wish it could be that we'll live and be close always, but I am having to face reality that they are growing up and will be moving on wherever God leads them. It is a very assuring, joyful thing to know my husband will still be here with me, even as our children go off to seek their way.

School days: observations

Disclaimer: Even though I sound quite snarky in this post, I do really love the kids I am working with. ;)

Some observations since I've been helping in a second grade class for 2 1/2 weeks:

1. Anything you eat, drink, wear (especially shoes), do differently to your hair, jewelry you wear (or don't) WILL be noticed aloud by at least half the class...usually the girls.

Anecdote: One day last week I wore my long, 3 tiered jean skirt to school with a tshirt and sadals. A little girl looked up at me from group time and said with a loud voice, "You look like a cowgirl!" Eeeehn ....not so much the look I was going for, but okaaay. The teacher snickered, "Just wait til you lose or gain a few pounds. They don't miss a thing!" Oiy.

2. Your name, age, voice, whistle blowing ability and fragrance will be scrutinized, pondered and pronounced judgement upon during recess.

Anecdote: V, a little girl of 7, but who has the demeanor and attitude of a 13 year old, was looking me up and down. I asked her if she needed something.

"No....where did you get those shoes?"
"They were my daughter's"
"You have a daughter? How old is she?"
"Seventeen"
"Where did she buy those shoes? Probably Mervin's, huh?"
"No, I think she got them at Walmart."
"Oh."

Later on in the recess, same girl:

"How old are you?"
"Not going to tell you."
"Are you 30"
"No, older"
"Are you 40?"
"Okay, we're lining up now, let's go."
"Are you 41?......42?......43?...44?....45?" She is now following me counting....
My brain is going, "lalalalaaaaaa, can't hear you, ignoring you.....lalalal...you are going away now...bye bye little twerpy."

3. A room full of noisy, out of control children on a Friday is much MUCH easier to take than a room full of quietly working children with one hummer. I have tried and tried to sneak up and find the hummer, but no success. When I do though...oh, yeah....I'll be on them like a jean skirt on a cowgirl. YEE haw"

4. There will be themes to your day as a teacher's aid.

~One day it was "You don't know what you are doing and you do everything wrong, so just try to blend into the wall." That was my first couple of days.
~Another day it was "Hunt down and bring back wayward children who have a bathroom pass, but who are really playing in the drinking fountain for 15 minutes....." Yes, that was as fun as it sounds. But you will not make me hunt you down, waaaaaaaay down in the bathroom at the end of the building on a day that is over 110F without paying consequences which are satisfying to ME."
~Finally, I had a day last week that was a theme I dread: Throwing up. The teacher read part of a story, ending with the little boy in the story sitting in the cafeteria, staring at his sandwich..... They were supposed to write what they think will happen next. Over half of them wrote, "He threw up." or "He got sick." Later in the morning I had to rush 2 seperate children to the nurse before they hurled on me. (I made it too.....woe to the day that I don't make it.)

5. It is almost impossible to get a group of over 40 children to stand in line quietly. Once you calm down one end, the other one begins. This happens every day when I have to take 2 classes of children from the cafeteria to the playground. A school rule is that the children have to walk QUIETLY when they are in line and on the sidewalk. *maniacal laughter* I just don't think will happen....

6. Children who are behaving very badly...VERY....will look at you with very cute cheribic faces and large brown eyes and cause you to not anhililate them on the spot. That is a good thing I guess. They are cute, that's for sure....grrrr.

7. Your classrooms will just never smell good after lunch and recess. bleh

8. Never eat or apply to yourself anything that has been given to you in a grubby little hand. And keep a large bottle of Germ X on your desk at all times.

9. Never open a second grader's milk carton for them without asking first. It is MOST offensive, in that they are very big now and can do it themselves.

10. On corndog day, mind the ketchup...it is EVERYWHERE.

Breaking my dry spell

I have not forgotten that I am a blogger. I am in a flurry of new schedules and the record setting heat here has totally zapped my enthusiasm or any creative thread that may run through my mind during the day. But I am so tired of opening my 'new post' page and sitting here looking at a blank slate, that I am just going to write and see what comes out. Hopefully it's something nice, positive and a little entertaining.

1. Two weeks ago, I started as a part time teaching assistant at our local neighborbood school. The first week of working at the school and then spending an hour in the car picking up my 2 daughters from their 2 schools, I would come home barely able to complete simple sentences and eyes glazed over. This week has been good and I feel like I am really starting to mesh with the teachers I work for and the children. Oh, the stories and snippets I could write about the children there. That will have to come later.... The complete sentences have come back to me but the eyes are still a little glazy.

2. My 17 year old has started her new job doing after school care at the place I worked at last year. She will come home and talk about the children she watches and tell stories. Then in the middle or beginning of the story, I stop her and say, "You mean Anthony?" or "You're talking about Kaitlin?" She likes it and I am vicariously reliving it through her stories. It's all the same stories, but the kids are another year older. I liked that job, but I think that working in the classroom suits me better. I do better with children (and like them more) in structured settings, instead of day care setting where it's freetime all the time. *shakes head and makes the 'yudda da yudda da' sound* (maybe you just have to see that in person, it's not translating well in type)

3. My oldest daughter, Hannah, is currently trying to decide whether or not to move to Phoenix and live with us again for a while. There are lots of pros and cons, but eventually she wants to make the move for schooling and she has a possible job opportunity here opening up soon. Hard life decisions! (I am rooting for her moving here of course.)

4. I am planning Maggie's birthday party for Sunday, late afternoon. It was a juggle to fit it in this year!!! She is turning 10, a double digit, which is a milestone here at our home. (meaning Charles will talk about it to the point of making us all roll our eyes and go, "yeah yeah whatever". lol)

5. I was going to announce that our puppy was completely housetrained....but....grrrrr And no one will yell at her about it except for me. Well I am the mother I guess, so it's my job to induce severe guilt and trepidation about tresspasses around here.

6. The first year of my dad's passing away has passed now. My mom is doing great, but it was a hard week for her. I kind of want to write about his death experience, but I am not sure what is appropriate or beneficial, so I am mulling that over. I feel like I was only slightly prepared to be with someone who was in the final stages of dying, thanks to Hospice. The people assigned to our family were very informative and helpful. And because of that....because they talked so openly and frankly about what could happen during those hours, I was better able to handle it. Some things may have scared me if I had seen them without prior knowledge of those things. So I feel like sharing our experience might help others to understand death better and not to be afraid to be there for someone who is dying. Any thoughts on that would be appreciated by comment or email...thanks.

7. With all the busyness this summer and now with work and school starting up, I feel more and more isolated and removed from my friends here in town. I depend more and more on my friends online, fellow pastor's wives at a forum I go to. They are very supportive and we connect really well because we all have so much in common. But I am thinking I need to try to build my 'in town' relationships more. I need some real arms to hug me sometimes and real women to connect with. (absolutely no offense my fellow pw's! I love you guys much much) So even though my brain is saying "stay home and relax quietly in your jammies", tomorrow night I'm going to a friend's house to watch a fun movie with some of our church women. I'm sure they wouldn't mind if I wore my jammies either, but I think I will wear clothes....and shoes.

8. It is HOT here. Normal temperatures for this time of year in Phoenix are 90's or so, which is very liveable in the dry climate. The past 2 weeks and more have been 110ish and over. It makes ordinary errands, waiting at the curb to pick up kids at school, playground duty and going out to get the mail sheer torture! It also makes people grouchy. So imagine living in a large city of tortured, grouchy people. bleh The hot spell is supposed to break over the weekend....we'll see.

9. Ummm, I forgot what I was going to say....I'm trying to listen to Maggie read a story out loud on my right, Emma is practicing on the snare drum in the background, and Bethany is talking to me on my left side and typing away with homework. (I wish I had an icon face to insert here to show how I am feeling in my head, but I don't think one exists. But if you ever find a smiley icon with eyes that fly open wide, continue to grow until they pop and drumsticks pounding on it's ears at the same time, please send me the url....thanks.)

10. I may do a Friday's Feast for tomorrow. I will have to look at it first. Last week had hard questions for this pw of very little brain.

11. I do NOT know where my pretty blog outfit went. I am very sad seeing my page without the flowery swag at the top.

ETA: I went to the website where my blog design comes from and it has exceeded it's bandawith or something like that. So I think it's just temporary. ;)

Friday's Feast #155

For more to feast on, go to Friday's Feast. Or whip up your own feast and leave your blog address in the comments section there to share it.

Appetizer
What is your favorite kind of pie?

I hate it when I have to choose. I like variety! Some of my favorites are: chocolate silk, lemon meringue, apple, and pecan, as well as chicken pot pie...yum!

Soup
Name something that made you smile this week.

-My nephew Gabriel, 18 months old...he loves me.
-An impromptu dance with Maggie in the pool today.
-Driving my husband's new (used) car....smooth.
-The look on my 15 yr old's face when she got her first cell phone. Little does she realize it is for US, not for her. They should just get real and call teen cell phones tracking devices or electronic leashes.
-The sounds of my 9 yr old having a 20 minute phone conversation with her 20 yr old sister.
-My mom holding our new puppy on her lap. Maisy loves her and kept wanting up there.
-Maisy being carried into the house dripping wet by my husband. I thought she had fallen in the pool, but Charles confessed that he had simply been watering the garden. It appears she likes to chase, tackle and attack water coming out of a hose. :roll: And I think he was encouraging it.
-My 17 yr old cooking lunch for us today.....orange chicken, rice and asperagus!
-Email from my friend Kelly.
-Massive late night PMing (on a forum) with my friend Michele.

Salad
What do you do to cool off when the weather is hot and humid?

Float. (in the pool) Dreyers creamy coconut fruit bars are nice too....or a Slurpee.

Main Course
You receive $1,000 in the mail with a letter that says you can only use the money to redecorate one room in your home. Which room do you pick, and what do you buy to spruce it up?

KITCHEN!! (or hall bathroom)

Dessert
Fill in the blank: My _________ says __________, but I __________.

I'm not up for that tonight. Fill in your own blanks. (said in a nice way)