March 20, 2006

Madness...


Have you ever felt like you can't handle one more thing on your plate...or in your head?

I feel that way this past week.

The moving is over, we're all settled in, things are put away. But settling into a new routine, and trying to get used to a new schedule of events is maddening to me. By personality, I am an ESFP. I don't do stress very well or big responsibilities or organizing. And here I am, trying to do my best to get used to new organization in my life.


The ESFP under a great deal of stress gets overwhelmed with negatives thoughts and possibilities.


Sunday was about my last straw. It was fun having our friends from Williams here for church, having an old friend we knew in New Jersey here to visit while searching for homes. (they are moving here in June!) And I think I could have handled that part. But my husband and 3 of my daughters were leaving on a mission trip to Mexico right after the service. I was frantically trying to keep track of our visitors and make plans for later in the day, all while answering about a hundred questions from my family and trying to take orders for what to get them from Taco Bell.

I totally lost track of our friend from New Jersey. I never saw him again after Taco Bell. Maybe he gave up trying to follow me around. This is why I never take positions of leadership. It makes me nuts.......NUTS! People should never trust me to be organized or to be in charge of things.

I was concerned about getting home to meet the pool guy from church who was going to install a new vacuum thingie in our dirty, neglected pool....it was raining...did I mention it was raining during all of this? I usually love the rain, but this day it was just tapping on my brain like a very annoying fingernail....taptaptaptaptaptaptap.....ha! I was ready to either burst into tears or maniacal laughter.

I think I am pre-menopausal...did I mention that? (for the past 2 months...pms off and on unpredictably creeping up on me)

Well, the day did settle down after the really cool new pool sweeper thingie was installed and I went to get my niece to come spend the night, since it was just me and Maggie. I put a movie on for the girls in my bedroom and put on my comfy jammies and huddled on the couch for the rest of the evening.....and into the wee hours of the morning actually.

When Charles is away, I usually stay up late, so that I can fall asleep easily. I got a little carried away playing Sudoku online and before I knew it, it was 2am. I fell completely and soundly asleep until I heard knocking at my front door at 8something am. It was the city water department. My head did that little freaking out feeling...I think it's a rush of adrenaline squirting out into your brain or something. I had forgotten that the city was going to turn off our water today to fix a leak in the main in front of our house. heh heh Well, he was warning me that we had 20 minutes before the water was shut off.

Fast gear for me is pretty frenetic....I started rushing around to get my shower taken and pots filled with water so we could wash hands and have water to use. Not a very good way to start off a day that you thought was going to be recuperative from a stressful weekend! So after I fixed the girls their oatmeal with apples and did some morning chores…..

…..my mom called to remind me that she had something that needed to go to the medical lab today for my dad's testing. (Don’t you love these stories that just seem to go on and on, piling events up til they reach the sky?) Still in high gear from that early (for me) morning adrenaline shot, I packed up the kids and took them to my sister’s house while I ran my mom’s errand, grabbing the phone book on the way out, thinking I might stop by a used furniture store to look for bedroom furniture that we’ve been talking about. At my sister’s we made a list (what a concept!!) of consignment furniture stores from the phone book and I made a plan of attack, noting from 1-6 the most convenient order in which to visit them and make a quick trip of it while she watched Maggie for me.

Arriving at my mom’s, I got the directions to the medical lab, all the information for my dad’s medical history, my mom’s power of attorney papers, his insurance card and the ‘things’ I needed to drop off. And I got another errand….they urgently needed some things from the store….uh, the maniacal laughter with a side of hair pulling almost kicked in.

I got the deeds done in short order (see reference to adrenaline squirting into my head) and may I just say here that it’s really a weirdly humiliating feeling to purchase two large bags of Depends undergarments in a busy Walgreens while being waited on my a 20something woman and being looked over the shoulder by a 30something man. Oiy! I arrived to find my mom having a hard time with my dad. (for reference, my dad has dementia and chronic bladder and kidney problems and my mom recently had hip replacement surgery) So I stayed a while and made them lunch and got them all settled before snatching my leave to run my quick errands.

Most of the shops had the usual assortment of old fashioned and over priced furniture, but I did happen upon a bed stand and a dresser that were just what we needed! (after I prayed desperately for the Lord to help this trip on such a busy day profitable) I enjoyed the time out by myself with no one to distract me from my task….i.e. Maggie. (she’s so sweet and fun, but so talkative and distracting when you’re on a mission!)

I am home now….Charles called to say he and Hannah are headed home from Mexico (about 3 hours drive)…reheated leftovers for dinner and am comfy on my couch blogging away about my burdens.

I can feel them lifting away. I’m relieved to have my friendly husband coming home tonight, along with my girl Hannah, who is home on Spring Break, to have new bedroom furniture to look forward to installing, and to be ever so close to my bedtime!

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